I had a conversation with my sister last night that is resonating with me still. As I read this blog entitled “Justified Journey”, pictures of seashores, tall trees, fine china, beautiful tulips and vintage antiques welcome me to the page. The thought crosses my mind that maybe what I stated to my sister was not entirely true.
My dream for so long has been to move to North Carolina, to live on the coast with a direct view of the ocean. I have pictured it and desired it in my mind the last 17 years of my life. I don’t know what pulls me to that idea. I have had it in my mind that moving there is just the answer for me. Location is never the answer though, not really, not in exclusion to what matters most like those we love and the ability to spend time with them.
In the last week as I have thought about the possibility of it becoming a reality, I have also thought that maybe I don’t want it any longer, maybe. Yes living in the warmer climate with the feel of ocean air and beautiful sun sets does sound tantalizing, the idea of going there alone and without my family has become enough of a reason not to.
It is not that I am not independent enough. No, I have lived with more than enough of that trait my whole life. It is just that I have come to really appreciate my sister, her boys, and the closeness I have to my mother and other family that the thought of not being able to see them just whenever holds me back. Their presence in my life is not something that I take lightly. It has been the most enjoyable thing in my life until now.
But…How do you avoid the very thing that calls to you out of the desire to remain safely where you are? As life changes and people change, our circumstances never stay the same. I really believe that there are opportunities in our lives that we are undoubtedly meant to take. Getting married, falling in love, and having a baby are good examples of some. All of these change your life and your future. They change your situation and alter the place that you are coming from, but with them they bring new life and new joys.
Can we really afford to sit and cling to those things that make us happy and at peace now? Do we need to faithfully and trustfully let go of all that we have and are, trusting in what God has for us in our tomorrow?
Maybe this long awaited desire of mine was placed here for a purpose, a reason. Maybe it is exactly the wind I need beneath my wings to do exactly what it is I need to do.
Inspiring Blog: http://justifiedjourney.blogspot.com/