Wading the storms of Life...together in word.

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Loving the Important things of life....

There is such a beauty in this place.  Day in and day out we run around with the important tasks of the day, feeling as though we will never get it all done.  I am as bad as the next guy, sometimes worse.  When I get overwhelmed with my impossible to do list, I franticly tell everyone "but I have this, this, and this to do".  Ignoring the fact that they really don't care because they also have this, this, and this to do.

Why do we feel all of "this" is so important?

One of my to dos is to write my very first book.  I have wanted to do this for several years now. Now I am in a place that God has clearly said "this is the time".  My prayer was not to miss it.  "Lord, please do not let me push writing out of the way out of business." 

With being a student and setting a semester out, I realize the value of this little bit of time I have to really get started.  I have the opportunity in front of me to let God move and work through me or to make excuse after excuse and find the time pass me by with nothing to show for it.  Maybe your thing is not a book.  Maybe your thing is a parent that needs you or a child that rarely gets to spend time with you but will be grown soon.  There are so many choices we make each day. 

I don't know about you but I would really like to learn not to let "important" things stand in the way of IMPORTANT things.  I love this place too, this place of solitude, this place of accepting, realization, growth, healing and just down right intimacy with the One True Living God!....mmmm..God is good, so good.

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

The Unmarried Me!

I was flipping through the bible, reading different verses when I flipped to 1 Corinthians.  Marriage has been a desire of mine since childhood, looming over me like a dark cloud that never rains.  I thought to myself, praying though, “Lord I don’t see it. I don’t know or see one single man that I can see myself with.” 

I had been thinking of the last guy I had feelings for. Those feelings were lingering though I really wanted to see them go.  As I thought this prayer and turned these pages, the words “unmarried” and “virgin” stood out to me.  I had turned to 1 Corinthians 7:34 & 35.  The verse states “an unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit.  But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world – how she can please her husband.  I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.”

Lately as I prayed, “Lord, who am I going to marry?” The answer that echoes in my heart is “Me. Mary me, Laura.” 

It is impossible to say that that is not enough.  So I sit here in silence, loving Him and wondering ‘what is next’?

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Hugs to my Loved Ones.

My brother and oldest nephew just left. They scurried off to a near by lake hoping to prove themselves as men by catching large catfish. They make me smile.  I remember them both from when they were only running around in diapers and still trying to talk.  Even though one is my brother and the other my nephew, they both act more like brothers who live apart.

Family is good.

It is hard for me to say that.  Not because it is not true but because like anyone, I have had my fair share of hurt feelings and disappointments.  My main regret is how long I have chosen to carry those hurt feelings and not live in love and forgiveness.

I have met a few people recently that have lost a loved one,  and most of them have been parents.  Even my own mother lost her parents not long ago, but when you see someone your own age loose a mother or a father, you realize how close the time is that you may loose one of your own.  I hope and pray as we all do that for me that will be a long way off.  Maybe someday after I am long since married and my children are grown, but then again maybe I need to realize right now that even though what I have may not be perfect, in it's own way it is still good and I am still blessed.  I love my family.  I know they love me.  My prayer is that my actions start to show it a little more than before.

Peace and prayers to you all,
Laura ~

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Pile of book.

I look at the pile of books stacked on my dresser, then to the left to those stacked on the floor.  There are so many of them, sitting there as though they were easy to create.  Each one filled with numerous pages of valid information, stories of expression and hope or guidance for the road I hope to take.  How do you get to this place?  How do you get to the place were you have a finished piece of work like these beautiful items setting before me?

It has been my goal for several years now to write and share my story.  I have been told over and over by so many that they would like to hear it.  They want to read it.  There is a curiosity there that even I want to know.  What is my life?  What has it been?  What is it going to be?  I think of the young speaker and writer that have influenced many.  He is a deep encouragement to me now.  His name is Nick Vujicic.  His story is not like mine but then again it is.  A lot of us who write have the same over all story.  This is my life. This is what happened to me.  This is what I overcame and what I hope for you to take away from my experience.  I know it sounds very lame to state it all like that.  But these sentences are what make me think, What makes my story any different?  What makes my words any more valuable than those that are not printed?

There is a doubt in me that overcomes me like a cloud of despair.  I know it is typical for all writers to have these difficult thoughts. “You don’t really have a book.”  “You just think you are better than you really are, more important.”  “When you really start this, you will realize what a fraud you are.  That is what this is all about.  This is just to prove that you are wrong and you are not all that you think you are meant to be.”

There is such a part of me that wants to stop now and say, “I am not who I thought I was. I am no one special. I don’t have anything major to offer. I’m sorry that I thought I did.”  If I don’t put myself out there, if I don’t risk, I don’t have anything to loose…..WRONG!!!  I have everything to loose.  I am going to prove myself wrong. I am going to work through my self doubt.  I am going to write my story and if no one other than my close friends and family read it than at least it was done and I did not chicken away from the idea of failure.   Lord Jesus, please help me.

Laura ~

Friday, August 12, 2011

Living in a moment of AWE!

It has been several days since I have posted. I have not been very good about staying consistent, and as I have seen more blogs by others I am realizing that there are so many changes I would like to make. 

But for now….I will just say this.  “What is there really to say?”

I don’t really mean that there is nothing to write or talk about. I don’t mean that there isn’t something of great need and value to pray.  We all know that there definitely is.  What I do mean is …

…..I sat down a moment ago to pray and realized I needed not to pray.  I sat down just now to think and talk to God only to realize that the silent stillness is all that needed to really take place.  What could give God more pleasure than to simply be still and know that He is God.  What a beautiful expression of love and praise.  What a moment of peace and acceptance!  What a moment of full trust and reverence!  It is like something so pure and spectacular that there are not words to give it justice and you must just sit in awe. 

God the Father, God the Son (Christ Jesus) and the Holy Spirit deserves our awe!

Monday, August 1, 2011

Do not let the sun go down upon your anger....Fighting the Marriage War.

“God calls us to make love the core principle of our life. Marriage is the place for us to express love in the fullest manner.  The kind of love God calls us to is more than a feeling, although that’s an important aspect of it. More importantly, it means serving our spouse with a sacrificial attitude and putting their needs before our own. It also means opening our life so they know us completely.  Love should undergird everything we do. Even when we disagree, we can do so with an attitude of RESPECT AND LOVE.”
..Love & Cherish @2008 Lighthouse Christian Products……….

This is on a card I got at the Berean Christian bookstore today that on the reverse side quotes …”live a life of love…Ephesians 5:2”.  

Once I asked a friend about the concern of working through a fight or even “dead moment” in a marriage.  “How do you not let the sun go down upon your anger?  How do you work through the major issues of marriage without letting the very place you rest – your own bed be a war zone?”

This has been one of my big concerns in marriage.  My home is really my haven. It is where I come to relax, recoup, and prepare for everyday life. I do not want my home or especially my own bed to be a war zone with the person I am suppose to love and ‘live for.’  His response was that even when you don’t “feel” like it, you put the other person first. You do something for them that is outside of yourself but meets their deepest need. 

This act of sacrificial love is apparently what it takes to break the brokenness of the original hardened moment.  It sounds so easy on paper.  Will I actually accomplish it though in life?  I guess only time and trial will tell, right?  I pray that you have and are finding success in that today.