My thoughts are just a blur.
The days are going quickly. Time
is running fast and running out. There
is still so much to do. I worked
today. Sunday is my only off day but I
worked because a coworker really needed me to.
My sister’s birthday was today also.
I took a quick shower, bought her gift and then went to spend a few
hours with her and the boys to celebrate the day she came into this world. I
love that girl! I wish I could have
spent more with her. The night is almost
over though and there is still so much more to do.
I think what I like most about sitting at my computer and
writing is the silence and solitude in it all. For one small moment all of the
world stands completely still and all the thoughts, feelings, and unsure
reactions to life begin to make sense. Even
if that sense is just the knowledge that in the end none of it matters.
I want to be still so bad.
I want to go to the park and play ball with the boys or go out one
Saturday night with the girls and get dressed up. I want a lot of things. Most of which you have heard me state many
times before. BUT, what I want right
this minute is to just be done. That would
mean I got through it all, succeeded and stand “done” on the finish line, ready
to finally live. So I take a moment, just
a moment, whenever I can and remind myself that, so that I can go another day.
“Wait upon the LORD.
Be strong & take heart and wait upon the Lord.” Psalm 27:14
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